The Guardian
Independent daily newspaper since 1821
Madrid, October 11, 2037
‘Plants take revenge on predatory humanity’
Be the Change!, a global network of young people, has hijacked the COP42 climate conference on its opening day. Their spokesperson, Alis de Vos, revealed that edible plants are now systematically threatening human fertility through their hormone production. She can communicate with plants, she claims, and she implied that they are turning against humanity.
‘We’re killing nature, and nature is hitting back,’ said De Vos, a Belgian scientist and one of the leaders of Be the Change!, in a speech that’s already a sensation at COP42. De Vos and her team discovered that hormone production in plants is much more widespread than previously assumed. In large-scale fruit plantations, plants produce the human female hormones estrogen and progesterone in doses comparable to those of the contraceptive pill. De Vos studied five mega-plantations on different continents. Everywhere, plants are producing much higher levels of the hormones than was thought.
It has been known since the 1990s that intensively cultivated potato varieties and date palms produce ever-higher levels of estrogen and progesterone. At the time, scientists viewed this growing threat to human fertility as a result of genetic engineering and the use of a new class of chemical pesticide. Alis De Vos points to a much broader phenomenon: ‘We have strong evidence that the leaves, fruits, and seeds of all the plants we studied contain ever-higher doses of hormones. Even those without genetic engineering, and even in crops that are not sprayed with chemicals: there is no other possible interpretation: plants are setting limits to human fertility.’
That’s a collective plant-based action, concludes Be the Change!. ‘As long as we humans continue to prioritize growth economies and excessive profits, and allow for abuse and exploitation of nature to achieve these goals, plants will fight back.’
Since its founding in 2032, Be the Change! has grown into a global network of environmentally engaged young adults. De Vos stunned the COP42 audience with a second revelation. Her novel Reports from the Forest, made famous by the successful animated series, is not fiction, she claimed. The book relates the story of six young people kidnapped by a Mother Tree who brought them to the forest to learn how to interact respectfully with nature.
‘I didn’t make that story up,’ De Vos revealed. ‘it’s exactly what happened to me and my companions — however unlikely that may seem. Our adventure gave birth to Be the Change!’
According to De Vos, fifteen years ago, Mother Trees in forests around the world began to recruit young people in order to radically change their attitude toward nature. The participants underwent an overwhelming experience, which forged the Be the Change! network. They’ve waited all these years to tell their story.
‘No one would have believed us then,’ De Vos explained to a speechless room full of officials and diplomats. ‘You might have packed us off to a psychiatric hospital. Yet things are changing. You’re finally beginning to understand the powers and significance of nature. Rivers, forests, mountains, and lakes are gaining legal personality; your governments are inviting shamans for consultations. It’s only logical. Now, more-than-human beings are beginning to play a central role in series and stories.’
Be the Change! learned from the Mother Trees that there is only one solution to avert impending mass infertility: humanity must radically change its attitude. On all continents, towards all natural resources and all other living beings.
‘It is a matter of life and death for the continuation of the human race on this planet,’ were De Vos’ closing words, before paying tribute to the trees, and plunging the audience into a charged, meditative silence.